Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Meme. HSM. AI......

MEME *****UPDATED*******

I am completely meme-alicious! I was tagged yet again- this time by Luann . I am supposed to write a six-word memoir. So here it is:

Tired, definitely waiting for the shout.

If any of you would like to do this as well, consider yourself tagged by me.

Okay, I have been tagged by Cassie for a "3 Random Things Meme". She said it is because I am good with 'randomness'. What Cassie doesn't know is that random posts are my way of throwing you off by rambling on and on about things that don't matter so that you won't catch on to my lack of intelligent blog posts. Guess my secret's out.

Somehow this turned into a "random things from your college days" list.......who knew?

Here are the rules:1. Post three random things about yourself.2. In your post, link to the person who tagged you.3. Tag at least five other bloggers. Let them know you've tagged them by commenting on their blog with an invite to participate


My first 2 years of college were spent at ETSU. I lived in the dorm. Many nights instead of studying, we would put panty hose on our heads and knock on other girl's doors to scare them. We would laugh until we cried (or lost all bladder control). I know it doesn't sound that funny to those of you who have never looked at yourself with pantyhose on your head, but trust me, it is funny - really funny. To get a good idea of just how funny, go get a pair of pantyhose, pull them over your head, and go immediately to the closest mirror. I promise you will laugh (if you don't then you have no sense of humor and are not welcome to visit this blog again). Nude pantyhose work best, but if suntan is all you have, then they will do as well. Then picture going to someone's door and seeing them jump back and scream for dear life when they see you standing there in all your pantyhoed glory (yes, I just used the non-word pantyhoed - my blog). Those were the good old days. Memories, like the corners of my mind, misty water colored memories of the way we were...............


My final years of college were spent at Virginia Intermont where I graduated Summa Cum Laude with a 3.98 gpa. There were no panty hose incidents during my time there. It's amazing what a person can do when they take the hosiery off their head and truly study.


I am not at all proud of this (okay I am kind of proud but pretending not to be): There was a girl who lived down the hall from me in the dorm. She was there on a full paid scholarship - got her own room - no room mate - everything paid for - she didn't have to work like some of us did - she was loud and obnoxious - not a very nice person, but the worst part was that she was a thief. We would lose things and she would 'find' them, if you know what I mean. One of the things she loved to steal aside from clothing was food. The girl had a free meal ticket - I didn't even own a meal ticket!

Anyway, all the people on our hall shared a common refrigerator - we simply put our name on our food so no one bothered it. No one except her. For months we lost over half the things we put in the fridge. So, several of us got together and decided to take matters into our own hands. This is the part I am semi-not proud of ......we bought some chocolate ex-lax and made a huge bowl of pudding. We put in the refrigerator with my room mates name on it and waited. My room was closest to the restroom so we all piled into it and left the door open to see what happened. Sure enough, within about 2 hours the trips to the bathroom began and every time she passed by we all hi-fived.

As I said, I am semi- ashamed of myself. You who are without sin cast the first stone. Even more ashamed now than then, because then I was not even semi-ashamed - I was proud. Doesn't Proverbs tell us that a girl who will not work will not eat?


Okay, I know that this meme only asked for 3 things, but I thought I would throw in a bonus. Many of you may not be aware of this, but back when I lived in Vegas, I made a living playing poker. ..........................okay, that's a lie, but doesn't it sound more exciting than "I put ex-lax in someone's pudding"? Just trying to spice things up a bit.

Okay, now I have to tag some people, so I am going to tag people that most of you have not read much about...........I tag Luann, Patty, Amanda, Anna, and Jenny.


On to other news........

What time is it? Summer time.

If those words don't mean anything to you then you will think I am crazy for paying an arm and half a leg for tickets to take the boys to see High School Musical on ice. I have been assured that it is a wonderful, wholesome show that kids and parents will enjoy.

Attention grandparents, we are now taking donations for the purchase of souvenirs at the show.......you wouldn't want your little grandsons going around without a High School Musical t-shirt and flashing necklace light and those things cost money ya know (don't worry, I know you guys have short memories so I will call and remind you of your monetary obligation).


I fear that the ludicrous and unkempt state of Jason Castro's hair may become a trend. I was sitting at a red light yesterday in our small town and was shocked as I looked to the car beside me. There in that little 1988 Toyota Camry was a young man with the same skanky hairdo as Jason Castro. So at this time I would like to send out a plea to all men young and old:

Attention all crunchy granola, hemp necklace wearin', sandal sportin', Goodwill shoppin', no deodorant guys: The dread locks you see on American Idol are not cool. They are in no way environmentally friendly. They are nasty - no seriously nasty - that hair cannot be clean. I know it is tempting when you think of never having to actually wash your hair, but resist the temptation. Besides the fact that it is unsanitary, you will never get a job with hair like that. It is all well and good to be a tree hugger I suppose, but let's not look and smell like one. Go ahead and drive your Volvo station wagon woody, go ahead and wear shirts that urge us all to save the planet, go ahead and eat your natural soy foods, but in the name of all that is good and green, please cut and detangle your hair!!!!!

For those of you who did not see AI last night, let me fill you in. The singing was okay, the show was semi-boring, and Paula Abdul proved that she is in fact a drug addict. Actually, you didn't miss anything - just another night on the AI stage. I could go on and on about the freakiness that IS Paula, but instead I decided to go about it another way..........

I would now like to send a message to Paula Abdul.

Dear Paula,

After the disaster that WAS American Idol last night, any doubts America had about your crack addiction have been laid to rest. We all watched in horror as you made a complete fool of yourself. We cringed when an embarrassed Simon came to your rescue. We all know - America knows. Straight up now tell us the truth, Paula, it's time to face up and fess up. As soon as this season is over, please run, don't walk to your nearest rehabilitation center. What better way to spend your hiatus from AI than getting clean? There is no shame in asking for help.


AI Watchers Everywhere


Mari said...

I love your ex-lax story and I want to know if she learned a lesson or continued in her evil ways! I missed AI last night, but heard about Paula's little incident. Wonder how she'll explain that one?

Alana said...

Okay, I would have been impressed enough with a 3.98 GPA, but a 4.98? You must have done a lot of extra credit ;-)

Kelly S. said...

You'll love HSM, I took my girls last fall in Knox. However, there is this one seen in which a over zealous Troy removes his shirt. Was that in the movie?? I don't think so.....my girls were WAY too giggly about it. (gross! is what I was thinking)

Stephanie (Ocean Mommy) said...

AI was just plain boring tonight! The whole show I felt like I was 14again and humming along to these song while I sat in the orthodontist chair...

And Paula....good grief. I say find a new "nice" judge. She just needs to go.

Cheryl said...

Ok, I was rolling while reading the "pantyhoed" story. And then the exlax story, oh...too...much!
I have to catch my breath!
I'm with Mari, did she learn her lesson?

I'm Sadie said...

I want to know too! DID she learn her lesson! I was giggling through the pantyhose story and the ex-lax story. I missed AI last night, so I don't know what Paula did, but I have to agree with her trip to rehab! I HATE the dreads too. Gross!

Mommyluann said...

I've tagged you! see my blog!

Mommyluann said...

I missed the Paula episode.

Elax...??Oh Beth...no casting stones here though!!!

what a GPA....woo hoo!!! I did pretty good, but I had a few C's I was really proud of!!!!!

Eddie said...

Well, Im just wondering if you cleaned this blog up knowing that your Dad would read it? I can clearly see you doing those things and then I wonder how you turned out so precious. By the way, this grandparent got the message, but I would suggest that if you can build that great big house, furnish it, go on vacation and not call your Dad for over a week, then I suggest you save enough to buy those trinkets for the boys. Now what ya gotta say for yourself Mrs Ex Lax pusher. Love you, Dad

BethAnne said...

The reason we need money for trinkets is because we are building that big house and going on vacation....the reason I havent called my dad is because I havent been home in a week.........errands and such, ya know.

Fran said...

Seriously??? 4.98??? I've taken you to a whole notha level!!!

You rock!

Carol said...

Too funny! Ah, the college days. You cracked me up with the ex-lax story.

Jennifer Partin said...

That ex-lax story was funny! Reminds me of a time when we lived in a condo and had a newspaper thief. One morning we set out an old newspaper rolled up----except in the inside we wrote in big letters "Thief!".

For someone who doesn't get to watch AI in Japan, you sure are getting me hooked! :)

Greg P. said...

Beth, I HAD to comment on the ex lax story. It seems to be pretty popular with your readers. There's nothing like a college education, is there? You don't learn everything in a classroom. Good job!

jennyhope said...