Wednesday, October 8, 2008

A Quick Fix

As you read this, please know that I am probably slaving away at the house that will never be finished new house. While you are sitting in a cushy chair in front of your computer, I am probably lifting objects that are way too heavy for me to lift (even though I AM freakishly strong - just ask my husband). While you take a sip of your mocha latte, I am most likely shoveling gravel and various other types of rock & debris with a back that is still not completely over my last epidural (or my first epidural for that matter). As you surf the internet, just know that the callouses on my hands are becoming much more pronounced and the short nails that I had yesterday are now in the quick. Just thought you should know, please feel sorry pray for me.

Anyway, I have been in a state of 'discouragement' much of the time over the past couple of weeks. Nothing terrible has happened in my life (mostly little annoyances), but for some reason, I have found myself in personal 'funk' lately. This is not my normal outlook or attitude. I might be easily distracted, but not easily distraught. My mood is usually pretty upbeat, so depression is not something I have ever really had to deal with (and I use the term depression loosely - I don't want to make light of depression because I know there are people who are clinically and seriously depressed - that is not me).

So, yesterday as I was in the car line waiting to pick Lake up from school, I was praying for some deliverance from this funk and in that prayer I said, "Lord, you know these feelings of despair that I have been having lately, please take them away and fix my heart". Almost immediately, He said to my spirit "You don't need Me to fix your heart, you need to fix your heart on Me". Let me say that again "You don't need Me to fix your heart, you need to fix your heart on me". That's a powerful word. A word I needed to hear (and need to hear every day until I am raptured outta here). So, in addition to "For your glory", I am adding "Fix your heart on Me" to the list of phrases that I will be repeating over and over. I need to fix my heart on Him so my heart can be fixed completely. I was expecting Him to do all the work by giving me a quick fix, but He had something deeper in mind. Sometimes He allows trials in our lives in order to teach us. Maybe He has allowed these feelings of distress in order to teach me to fix my heart on Him.

I have so many thoughts rushing through my head about this subject and for the life of me, I just cant seem to make them into sensible sentences here in type. I hope what I have written makes some sort of sense even though it isn't written very eloquently (not that you expected eloquence from the Queen of Randomness - especially a Queen who is in a funk).

13 comments:

Cassie said...

Been there...I know exactly what you mean...Focusing and fixing our hearts on him...Something we should all try to focus on daily...He has been working on me lately too...Lots of issues going on in this crazy head of mine...and the whole time, He keeps telling me, Come to me...Don't try to deal with this one on your own...As you said, "Fix your Heart on Him.." Good words this am...Love ya!

Mari said...

Wow - that's a great prescription for being in a funk. I love it!

Teresa said...

Whoa....I think this post was for me..."Fix your heart on Me"!..
Needed this one, sister..needed this one..

blessings!
Teresa

Carol said...

Good word. I need to think on that one too.

Fran said...

I'm in that same stupid funk and now I'm praying exactly what you said...thanks Bethanne.

Mom is doing as well as she can be after surgery yesterday. Its been hard on this daughters heart. Maybe that is part of my funk too.

Anyway...gotta keep praying for us all. Life is hard.

I love ya,
Fran

Cheryl said...

Don't you just love it?! God loves us so much that He will speak directly into our hearts!!
Praying for you and I love that:
"Fix your heart on Me!"

Eddie said...

Remember the TV series called the
"A TEAM" One of the great quotes in those films was, "I love it when a plan comes together". That's what I thought of when I read your blog. God is your A TEAM and He has a plan and I believe He loves it when His plan comes together for good to those who love Him. Great Word Mrs. Bethanne. Dad loves you greatly.

Anonymous said...

Hmm, I'm imagining an angel that looks like Mr. T calling me a fool while Hannibal reminds me of God's plan. Thank you Eddie!
One of my pet phrases is "the joy of obedience". Just think of what the Father wants to give us when we simply trust and obey. Debbie

ocean mommy said...

The Funk. I've been there too. (more times than I care to admit) I think I'll write these 5 words on one of my famous 3x5 cards and carry it around with me. :)

Hugs....
steph.

Greg P. said...

I love it when God speaks to my heart. My eyes get big and wide and I KNOW who is doing the talking inside my head! How great is that!

"Fix your heart on Me". It sounds like the way God would communicate something to you.

btw... I don't drink mocha lattes.

Mommyluann said...

In a FUNK? I was there today...I appreciate the post.

Heidi Zawisza said...

Maybe you need to take a prego test.....I'm just sayin'......

Sandi Hixson said...

what a great post! thank you.....a prescription for all of us